Hey, I finally made the papers with my editorial about the Day of Silence/Day of Truth thing.

For those who don't know, The Auburn University Gay-Straight Alliance had a "Day of Silence" or something for something symbolizing something; that's really not the point. The point is that the fucking College Republicans led by the runners-up in the Little Miss Demagogue Contest, Laura Steele and Kristy Cottrell, showed up proclaiming a "Day of Truth" to counter "the homosexual agenda". They had signs and shit and there was a big argument on the concourse and the whole thing was just stupid.

Anyway, a couple weeks later, this fucking maggot named Drew White wrote an editorial to the Plainsman about the whole thing. It was bullshit, so, one day, in lieu of studying, I sat down and wrote the nastiest letter I could; thinking it would never get published. Well... it did.

Here's the edited version. (Originally I called the College Republicans "The Hitler Youth" and I called out Kristy Cottrell and Laura Steele by name.)

Editor, The Auburn Plainsman:

On April 26th, The College Republicans launched their “Day of Truth;” “a coordinated effort to counter the homosexual agenda”. I love how these people that base about 90% of their arguments for everything, from Iraq to border security, on “not forgetting the lessons of September 11th, 2001”, have forgotten the main lesson. On September 11th, there were no Democrats or Republicans; no black, white, gay, or straight. We all stood together. We were all Americans on 9/11/2001. It should still be that way, but, sadly, it's not that way anymore.

Our founding fathers built this country on the idea of freedom (never mind the fact that they were rich, white, racist, slave owners; when you talk to Republicans you have to use big general terms and mention “freedom” and “the founding fathers” to get your point across). A big part of freedom is the idea of tolerance. What The College Republicans don’t understand is that tolerance isn’t about liking and embracing an idea; it’s just about tolerating the idea. In other words, for the sake of tolerance and freedom just back off and let the people have their Day of Silence or whatever it is.

This is the point in which the most crafty College Republican, like Drew White, would say something like “The homosexual lobby preaches ‘tolerance’ and ‘equality’. Yet, when those opposed to their agenda speak out, they find such actions as ‘threatening’… Where’s the ‘tolerance’ and ‘equality’ again?” Okay, well if that argument doesn’t work for you, then here’s one: Show some common courtesy. The College Republican can sit on their high moral cloud all day about this issue, but the truth of the matter is that they’re using “The Day of Truth” as nothing more than an excuse to be standoffish. That’s right, I can see through you, and so can everybody else.

The purpose of The Day of Silence was to change some minds. The purpose of The Day of Truth was to be spiteful (a good Christian value, I might add. Jesus was a huge fan of spite). Should they have the right to be spiteful? Yes. Did they accomplish anything? Was their really a purpose? No. If you weren’t there to be positive and progressive, then why even go?

College Republicans, I know it's been difficult for you to find a divisive issue ever since "The Holiday Tree" incident, but please, go crawl back into your tent (or frat house, rather) of hatred until Christmastime rolls around again.

Rivers Langley
Sophomore, English

I was pretty happy with it, and I'm ready for the Opinion page flame war to begin.